WEBVTT NOTE This file was exported by MacCaption version 7.0.11 to comply with the WebVTT specification dated March 23, 2013. 00:00:00.667 --> 00:00:02.936 align:start line:79% position:44% size:78% male announcer: The following program is sponsored by friends 00:00:02.936 --> 00:00:04.938 align:start line:85% position:44% size:78% of LIFE Outreach International. 00:00:06.773 --> 00:00:09.142 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% announcer: Have you ever felt offended when people trample 00:00:09.142 --> 00:00:10.477 align:start line:69% position:50% size:35% your feelings? 00:00:10.477 --> 00:00:14.014 align:start line:63% position:47% size:63% Alexandra Hoover explains how you can let go. 00:00:14.014 --> 00:00:16.283 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Alexandra Hoover: The moment in my life, the point of inflection 00:00:16.283 --> 00:00:20.187 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% really with offense came through my biological dad. 00:00:20.187 --> 00:00:23.657 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% He was the first person in my life where I can remember 00:00:23.657 --> 00:00:26.860 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% looking at him and saying like, "Man, you betrayed me. 00:00:26.860 --> 00:00:28.395 align:start line:69% position:47% size:53% You betrayed my mom." 00:00:28.395 --> 00:00:32.266 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And he made choices to wound us, but it is a choice of ours to 00:00:32.266 --> 00:00:33.600 align:start line:69% position:48% size:33% heal from it. 00:00:33.600 --> 00:00:36.236 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% And that's something the Lord had to teach me. 00:00:36.236 --> 00:00:46.246 align:start line:85% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:00:46.246 --> 00:00:53.453 align:start line:85% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:00:53.453 --> 00:00:54.788 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% Randy Robison: Welcome to "Life Today." 00:00:54.788 --> 00:00:56.123 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% I'm Randy Robison. Great to have you here. 00:00:56.123 --> 00:00:57.591 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% Blynda Lane is with me. How are you? 00:00:57.591 --> 00:00:59.126 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Blynda Lane: Happy to be here. Thanks, Randy. 00:00:59.126 --> 00:01:00.627 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% Randy: Excited about today's guest. 00:01:00.627 --> 00:01:02.896 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Blynda: Awesome, she's an awesome--I've gotten to be with 00:01:02.896 --> 00:01:04.431 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% her a few times, she's amazing. 00:01:04.431 --> 00:01:05.766 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% Randy: Well, and we're glad to have her back. 00:01:05.766 --> 00:01:07.634 align:start line:69% position:50% size:70% Alexandra Hoover is with us. 00:01:07.634 --> 00:01:12.005 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% She has a new book called "You Can Let Go," and Alexandra, it's 00:01:12.005 --> 00:01:13.473 align:start line:63% position:48% size:43% great to have you back on the show. 00:01:13.473 --> 00:01:15.042 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% Alexandra: Hi, friends, it's so good to be with you. 00:01:15.042 --> 00:01:16.576 align:start line:69% position:45% size:73% You guys are both my friends. 00:01:16.576 --> 00:01:17.978 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% I feel, like, at home. It's great. 00:01:17.978 --> 00:01:19.313 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% Blynda: Yes, I know, we're so glad to have you. 00:01:19.313 --> 00:01:20.747 align:start line:69% position:50% size:61% And the book is so good. 00:01:20.747 --> 00:01:22.115 align:start line:69% position:47% size:53% Alexandra: Thank you. 00:01:22.115 --> 00:01:23.450 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% Blynda: So many nuggets as I was reading it. 00:01:23.450 --> 00:01:24.785 align:start line:69% position:48% size:48% It was really good. 00:01:24.785 --> 00:01:26.119 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% Randy: Yeah, well, let's dive into that. 00:01:26.119 --> 00:01:28.588 align:start line:69% position:46% size:68% What are you letting go of? 00:01:28.588 --> 00:01:30.157 align:start line:63% position:50% size:41% Alexandra: Yeah, what a question. 00:01:30.157 --> 00:01:32.659 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% What am I not letting go of, honestly? 00:01:32.659 --> 00:01:36.229 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% I think that, you know, as I wrote the message of "You Can 00:01:36.229 --> 00:01:40.267 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Let Go," there was a work that the Lord began to do in my life, 00:01:40.267 --> 00:01:44.471 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% and it was a work of showing me two things. 00:01:44.471 --> 00:01:48.442 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% One, the trap that offense had become in my life. 00:01:48.442 --> 00:01:52.179 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And it wasn't just the trap of pain or hurt, it was the trap of 00:01:52.179 --> 00:01:55.148 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% unhealed wounds, years of unhealed wounds. 00:01:55.148 --> 00:02:00.187 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And I began the process of allowing the Lord to release me 00:02:00.187 --> 00:02:02.990 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% out of this snare, to help me come out of the snare that 00:02:02.990 --> 00:02:04.992 align:start line:69% position:48% size:28% is offense. 00:02:04.992 --> 00:02:06.326 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% And it changed my life. 00:02:06.326 --> 00:02:09.563 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% Blynda: So how do you know, then, the difference between 00:02:09.563 --> 00:02:10.897 align:start line:69% position:48% size:43% hurt or offended? 00:02:10.897 --> 00:02:12.999 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% Like, how do you--what's that balance between those two? 00:02:12.999 --> 00:02:14.601 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Alexandra: That's such a good question, and I think a lot of 00:02:14.601 --> 00:02:16.103 align:start line:69% position:50% size:70% us ask that question, right? 00:02:16.103 --> 00:02:20.674 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% I would say this: Hurt is something that happens to us. 00:02:20.674 --> 00:02:22.009 align:start line:69% position:50% size:56% Like, it's inevitable. 00:02:22.009 --> 00:02:23.410 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% We're going to be hurt. 00:02:23.410 --> 00:02:27.347 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% All of us will experience a semblance of disappointment, 00:02:27.347 --> 00:02:28.682 align:start line:69% position:47% size:53% betrayal, or letdown. 00:02:28.682 --> 00:02:30.117 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% So hurt happens, right? 00:02:30.117 --> 00:02:33.520 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% Offense is something we pick up. 00:02:33.520 --> 00:02:35.455 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% Offense is something that we engage in. 00:02:35.455 --> 00:02:40.127 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Offense is something that we allow to become a trap, a snare 00:02:40.127 --> 00:02:43.263 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% in our lives, and ultimately, offense is something that we 00:02:43.263 --> 00:02:46.533 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% choose to hold ourselves hostage to. 00:02:46.533 --> 00:02:47.868 align:start line:69% position:48% size:48% Randy: Interesting. 00:02:47.868 --> 00:02:49.269 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% You know, the Bible says to Christians, "Don't give 00:02:49.269 --> 00:02:52.806 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% offense," you know, as long as possible, you know, and some 00:02:52.806 --> 00:02:55.042 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% people are offended by the gospel, so it does happen. 00:02:55.042 --> 00:02:58.311 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% But it also says not to take offense. 00:02:58.311 --> 00:03:02.649 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% And when I look at that, I see a give and a take. 00:03:02.649 --> 00:03:07.687 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Are you suggesting then that offense, when it happens, it's 00:03:07.687 --> 00:03:12.225 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% real, we're not denying it, but do we have a choice to take it? 00:03:12.225 --> 00:03:13.960 align:start line:69% position:50% size:70% Alexandra: Absolutely, yeah. 00:03:13.960 --> 00:03:17.497 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% I mean, if you look at the word offense, right, it's skandalon, 00:03:17.497 --> 00:03:20.133 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% and if you look a little bit deeper, the translation to that 00:03:20.133 --> 00:03:21.635 align:start line:69% position:48% size:28% is a snare. 00:03:21.635 --> 00:03:24.538 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% So if you've ever--I want you to imagine a physical snare, right? 00:03:24.538 --> 00:03:28.809 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% That's a trap, and it's used to capture things. 00:03:28.809 --> 00:03:31.011 align:start line:69% position:50% size:56% And we have an option. 00:03:31.011 --> 00:03:34.915 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% We have the choice to either walk in the trap, right into it, 00:03:34.915 --> 00:03:39.886 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% or identify the places in our lives that could potentially 00:03:39.886 --> 00:03:41.421 align:start line:69% position:48% size:38% become a snare. 00:03:41.421 --> 00:03:45.358 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And I do, I think it's a choice, and it's a choice that the Lord 00:03:45.358 --> 00:03:48.562 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% wants to reveal to us, right, that we can not make. 00:03:48.562 --> 00:03:51.798 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Like, we don't have to walk into that trap, and we can heal from 00:03:51.798 --> 00:03:53.533 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% our pain without it becoming offense. 00:03:53.533 --> 00:03:55.702 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% Blynda: So you talk about recognizing these 00:03:55.702 --> 00:03:57.070 align:start line:69% position:48% size:38% places, though. 00:03:57.070 --> 00:03:58.438 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% So what does that mean? 00:03:58.438 --> 00:03:59.806 align:start line:69% position:48% size:48% Are there symptoms? 00:03:59.806 --> 00:04:02.175 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% What kind of things can we look at to say, okay, I wanna keep my 00:04:02.175 --> 00:04:05.879 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% heart pure and not pick up offenses, but how do I know that 00:04:05.879 --> 00:04:07.247 align:start line:69% position:49% size:13% I am? 00:04:07.247 --> 00:04:09.649 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Alexandra: Yeah, what I think is really interesting about the 00:04:09.649 --> 00:04:12.219 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% human condition is that, and I talk a lot about this idea of 00:04:12.219 --> 00:04:13.553 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% the check engine light. 00:04:13.553 --> 00:04:16.389 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Like, we all have a check engine light, and it's the Holy Spirit. 00:04:16.389 --> 00:04:19.059 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% The Holy Spirit will show us and reveal things to us and guide 00:04:19.059 --> 00:04:21.495 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% us, and I'll use my own self as an example. 00:04:21.495 --> 00:04:24.364 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% I think that there are a few symptoms, as I like to call it, 00:04:24.364 --> 00:04:26.099 align:start line:69% position:50% size:45% that will come up. 00:04:26.099 --> 00:04:28.468 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% Being critical, having a critical spirit. 00:04:28.468 --> 00:04:31.271 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% When you become more critical of yourself or others, it's a great 00:04:31.271 --> 00:04:34.074 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% moment to say like, "Man, I wonder what's underneath that." 00:04:34.074 --> 00:04:36.276 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% Another one would be insecurity. 00:04:36.276 --> 00:04:39.779 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% I think there's a correlation, a connection to how rooted we are 00:04:39.779 --> 00:04:43.250 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% in our identity in Christ, and our ability to take offense 00:04:43.250 --> 00:04:44.584 align:start line:69% position:48% size:18% or not. 00:04:44.584 --> 00:04:45.952 align:start line:69% position:50% size:65% So I would say insecurity. 00:04:45.952 --> 00:04:47.287 align:start line:69% position:50% size:75% Another one would be jealousy. 00:04:47.287 --> 00:04:50.223 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% You begin to covet and really compare yourself to others. 00:04:50.223 --> 00:04:52.759 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% I think it's a question there to say, "Man, let's get curious 00:04:52.759 --> 00:04:54.327 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% about where that's coming from." 00:04:54.327 --> 00:04:57.397 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And a lot of the time we've either taken offense with others 00:04:57.397 --> 00:04:59.966 align:start line:69% position:50% size:50% or offense with God. 00:04:59.966 --> 00:05:01.368 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% Randy: Now, where did this come from? 00:05:01.368 --> 00:05:02.736 align:start line:69% position:50% size:41% Alexandra: Yeah. 00:05:02.736 --> 00:05:04.738 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% You know, I just woke up one day and I said like, "Man, I cannot 00:05:04.738 --> 00:05:06.072 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% wait to write a book about offense." 00:05:06.072 --> 00:05:07.407 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% Blynda: "I need to tell the world about offense. 00:05:07.407 --> 00:05:09.075 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% I don't have it, but I need to tell the world." 00:05:09.075 --> 00:05:10.410 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% Alexandra: Sure, "I've never walked through anything, you 00:05:10.410 --> 00:05:13.446 align:start line:69% position:48% size:38% know, similar." 00:05:13.446 --> 00:05:16.650 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% In my book, "You Can Let Go," I talk about how all of us have 00:05:16.650 --> 00:05:21.121 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% this, like, a genesis to pain, and the first chapter is called 00:05:21.121 --> 00:05:23.323 align:start line:69% position:50% size:65% "The Pain That Shapes Us." 00:05:23.323 --> 00:05:26.693 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% And for me, the moment in my life, the point of inflection 00:05:26.693 --> 00:05:30.597 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% really with offense came through my biological dad. 00:05:30.597 --> 00:05:34.067 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% He was the first person in my life where I can remember 00:05:34.067 --> 00:05:37.237 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% looking at him and saying like, "Man, you betrayed me. 00:05:37.237 --> 00:05:39.306 align:start line:69% position:47% size:53% You betrayed my mom." 00:05:39.306 --> 00:05:41.441 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And unbeknown to me, right, when you're a little girl and you're 00:05:41.441 --> 00:05:45.946 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% experiencing that much pain and disappointment, you don't 00:05:45.946 --> 00:05:50.984 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% realize the filter in which you really begin to live from. 00:05:50.984 --> 00:05:55.121 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% And I began to carry this filter and lens of offense my 00:05:55.121 --> 00:05:56.489 align:start line:69% position:48% size:28% whole life. 00:05:56.489 --> 00:05:59.793 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% And it wasn't just that I was easily wounded or offended 00:05:59.793 --> 00:06:01.161 align:start line:69% position:50% size:25% by others. 00:06:01.161 --> 00:06:04.364 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% No, there was a deep rooted sense of, not only is God not 00:06:04.364 --> 00:06:08.101 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% for me, but everybody is going to betray me and hurt me. 00:06:08.101 --> 00:06:12.405 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And until the Lord began to walk with me and and really go back 00:06:12.405 --> 00:06:15.875 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% to my past with me and say, "I want to heal you from these 00:06:15.875 --> 00:06:19.679 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% things that became a point of, you know, of a trap, that became 00:06:19.679 --> 00:06:21.548 align:start line:69% position:46% size:68% a point of offense for you. 00:06:21.548 --> 00:06:24.884 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Until we deal with that, Alex, you're not going to be free." 00:06:24.884 --> 00:06:26.853 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% So my dad, I mean the person that was supposed to really be 00:06:26.853 --> 00:06:31.224 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% there for me, the one that I'm like, "Man, the Lord really had 00:06:31.224 --> 00:06:34.861 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% this person in my life that that he gave me," betrayed us, and it 00:06:34.861 --> 00:06:36.229 align:start line:69% position:50% size:31% was painful. 00:06:36.229 --> 00:06:37.597 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% Randy: Yeah, and you do talk about it. 00:06:37.597 --> 00:06:40.734 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% So it wasn't just that, you know, your parents got divorced 00:06:40.734 --> 00:06:42.102 align:start line:69% position:48% size:33% or something. 00:06:42.102 --> 00:06:46.072 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% I mean, it was a harsh situation that you guys kind of 00:06:46.072 --> 00:06:47.440 align:start line:69% position:50% size:35% stumbled into. 00:06:47.440 --> 00:06:48.775 align:start line:69% position:50% size:70% Alexandra: Sure, absolutely. 00:06:48.775 --> 00:06:50.243 align:start line:63% position:47% size:63% I mean, yeah, stumble is such a great word for it. 00:06:50.243 --> 00:06:52.245 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% Just kind of that--truly stumbled into it. 00:06:52.245 --> 00:06:54.547 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% You know, I'm careful with my mom's story. 00:06:54.547 --> 00:06:58.518 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% As much as I get to talk about mine, my mom's story is hers to 00:06:58.518 --> 00:07:01.621 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% tell and I protect it as much as I can. 00:07:01.621 --> 00:07:04.524 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% But a lot of it is my story too, you know, and so in it I would 00:07:04.524 --> 00:07:09.329 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% say that my mom and my dad had a really complicated relationship 00:07:09.329 --> 00:07:11.531 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% and we did walk into it, truly. 00:07:11.531 --> 00:07:14.401 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% I think my mom came into the relationship hoping for the 00:07:14.401 --> 00:07:17.070 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% best, like I think a lot of us do with anything in our lives. 00:07:17.070 --> 00:07:20.073 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% And he made choices to wound us. 00:07:20.073 --> 00:07:24.010 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% He's an alcoholic, and through that, I think, made several 00:07:24.010 --> 00:07:27.747 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% decisions that impacted my mom which then impacted our family. 00:07:27.747 --> 00:07:30.216 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And you're right, it was a stumbling which I think a lot of 00:07:30.216 --> 00:07:33.253 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% the time, if I'm being honest, I think for many of us, hurt 00:07:33.253 --> 00:07:34.587 align:start line:69% position:50% size:35% happens to us. 00:07:34.587 --> 00:07:37.257 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Like, it happened to her and it became a, you know, a hurt for 00:07:37.257 --> 00:07:39.059 align:start line:69% position:48% size:18% me too. 00:07:39.059 --> 00:07:41.394 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% But it is a choice of ours to heal from it. 00:07:41.394 --> 00:07:43.163 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% And that's something the Lord had to teach me. 00:07:43.163 --> 00:07:45.198 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Blynda: So the question for me that when I'm thinking about the 00:07:45.198 --> 00:07:49.936 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% story that I read of yours, and then any other time in my life 00:07:49.936 --> 00:07:53.573 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% that maybe I've had the choice to carry offense, what's really 00:07:53.573 --> 00:07:57.344 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% hard, where I get stuck sometimes, is the idea that it 00:07:57.344 --> 00:08:01.314 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% almost feels like they got away with it, or like, am I supposed 00:08:01.314 --> 00:08:03.416 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% to be able to let go of this offense? 00:08:03.416 --> 00:08:09.789 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% Am I supposed to forgive when they seem to be just fine? 00:08:09.789 --> 00:08:11.124 align:start line:69% position:50% size:31% That's hard. 00:08:11.124 --> 00:08:12.592 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% Alexandra: It's incredibly difficult. 00:08:12.592 --> 00:08:17.897 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% I talk a lot about this idea, and this is really one of the 00:08:17.897 --> 00:08:21.468 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% foundational kind of truths that the Lord had to teach me, which 00:08:21.468 --> 00:08:26.473 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% is this: in order for God to heal me, to heal us, we don't 00:08:26.473 --> 00:08:29.809 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% need closure in the way that we think we do. 00:08:29.809 --> 00:08:33.913 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And I think the closure we're looking for is closure that can 00:08:33.913 --> 00:08:35.515 align:start line:69% position:48% size:48% only come from God. 00:08:35.515 --> 00:08:38.251 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% But the closure that we think we need is closure that we are 00:08:38.251 --> 00:08:40.553 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% waiting for somebody to provide, right? 00:08:40.553 --> 00:08:43.890 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% So if they don't apologize, if they don't circle back, if we 00:08:43.890 --> 00:08:47.527 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% don't see some sort of bow kind of tied up on the situation, it 00:08:47.527 --> 00:08:50.630 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% is difficult to grieve or difficult to heal, I should say, 00:08:50.630 --> 00:08:51.965 align:start line:69% position:50% size:21% from it. 00:08:51.965 --> 00:08:55.168 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% The Lord had to teach me that in order for me to actually heal, I 00:08:55.168 --> 00:08:58.104 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% had to stop looking for people to give me what only he can. 00:08:58.104 --> 00:09:00.807 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% Blynda: So some of that comes back to then our belief about 00:09:00.807 --> 00:09:02.709 align:start line:69% position:50% size:75% who God is in our life, right? 00:09:02.709 --> 00:09:07.013 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Like, how can we allow God to do that kind of work in our heart 00:09:07.013 --> 00:09:10.049 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% if we don't actually believe he's for us, and that he wasn't 00:09:10.049 --> 00:09:12.485 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% a part of causing the offense and the hurt? 00:09:12.485 --> 00:09:14.554 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% Alexandra: A hundred percent, you know, there's this 00:09:14.554 --> 00:09:18.224 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% undercurrent that is underneath this entire conversation which 00:09:18.224 --> 00:09:22.362 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% is, not only is God so compassionate and so comforting 00:09:22.362 --> 00:09:23.830 align:start line:63% position:47% size:63% in the midst of our pain, but also he's the God 00:09:23.830 --> 00:09:25.198 align:start line:69% position:48% size:38% of forgiveness. 00:09:25.198 --> 00:09:28.001 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% He's the God of love and comfort, and endless love and 00:09:28.001 --> 00:09:29.335 align:start line:69% position:50% size:61% comfort and forgiveness. 00:09:29.335 --> 00:09:33.006 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And so if I know that to be true about God, that he is a God who 00:09:33.006 --> 00:09:37.110 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% offers forgiveness and compassion and comfort, then 00:09:37.110 --> 00:09:39.345 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% because of that, I can trust him to not only deal with the people 00:09:39.345 --> 00:09:42.949 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% who have wounded me, but also deal with my pain in a way that 00:09:42.949 --> 00:09:44.517 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% I could never do on my own too. 00:09:44.517 --> 00:09:45.885 align:start line:69% position:45% size:73% And it is about trusting him. 00:09:45.885 --> 00:09:48.655 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% Do I trust him with my pain enough to heal me? 00:09:48.655 --> 00:09:51.424 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Randy: Yeah, well, and do you trust his justice over your own 00:09:51.424 --> 00:09:52.792 align:start line:69% position:48% size:43% sense of justice? 00:09:52.792 --> 00:09:54.127 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% Alexandra: Come on, that's a good one. 00:09:54.127 --> 00:09:56.529 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% Randy: You said a word on accident just now, and you 00:09:56.529 --> 00:09:58.798 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% corrected yourself, but I'm wondering. 00:09:58.798 --> 00:10:02.268 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% I'm wondering, because part of the reason I ask about your past 00:10:02.268 --> 00:10:06.773 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% is because I want people to understand that the offense, the 00:10:06.773 --> 00:10:09.576 align:start line:69% position:50% size:70% root offense, was very real. 00:10:09.576 --> 00:10:13.746 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% We're not here to say that it wasn't real or, oh, it's no big 00:10:13.746 --> 00:10:16.549 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% deal, or you just gotta let it go, right? 00:10:16.549 --> 00:10:19.319 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% You said the word "grieve," and then you corrected yourself. 00:10:19.319 --> 00:10:20.887 align:start line:63% position:47% size:63% Alexandra: I talk so much about grief in the book. 00:10:20.887 --> 00:10:22.755 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% I should have actually kept it. 00:10:22.755 --> 00:10:26.125 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Randy: Well, and I want to keep it because I think part of the 00:10:26.125 --> 00:10:28.495 align:start line:63% position:50% size:45% process may be grieving the pain. 00:10:28.495 --> 00:10:31.431 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% You know, you wanted a relationship with your dad. 00:10:31.431 --> 00:10:33.099 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% You didn't want the disruption. 00:10:33.099 --> 00:10:34.634 align:start line:69% position:50% size:56% Alexandra: I still do. 00:10:34.634 --> 00:10:36.269 align:start line:63% position:50% size:45% Randy: Is it fair? Is it right? 00:10:36.269 --> 00:10:41.241 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Is it healthy to grieve the loss and yet not be offended by it? 00:10:41.241 --> 00:10:42.575 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% Blynda: That's so good. 00:10:42.575 --> 00:10:47.213 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Alexandra: I think that not only is it fair, I think that a part 00:10:47.213 --> 00:10:51.551 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% of our process of letting go is grieving, not only the things 00:10:51.551 --> 00:10:53.686 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% that have happened to us, but also the things that we 00:10:53.686 --> 00:10:55.655 align:start line:69% position:50% size:35% couldn't have. 00:10:55.655 --> 00:10:57.023 align:start line:63% position:48% size:43% The things that we couldn't have. 00:10:57.023 --> 00:10:59.459 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And I think for me, allowing God to heal me and release me from 00:10:59.459 --> 00:11:02.095 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% my offense that I carried with not just my dad, I mean, there 00:11:02.095 --> 00:11:04.531 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% were friendship betrayals and implosions, like, we all have 00:11:04.531 --> 00:11:06.966 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% these moments in our lives where offense becomes a part of who 00:11:06.966 --> 00:11:08.334 align:start line:69% position:48% size:18% we are. 00:11:08.334 --> 00:11:11.304 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And I did, I had to grieve so much and trust God with my pain, 00:11:11.304 --> 00:11:16.242 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% and trust him enough to walk through the process of not only 00:11:16.242 --> 00:11:18.878 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% identifying the pain, which is really the most difficult part 00:11:18.878 --> 00:11:20.246 align:start line:69% position:50% size:21% of this. 00:11:20.246 --> 00:11:21.581 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% We don't want to say things hurt us. 00:11:21.581 --> 00:11:24.918 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% I didn't want to say that the betrayal or the, you know, the 00:11:24.918 --> 00:11:28.221 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% trauma really impacted me as much as it did. 00:11:28.221 --> 00:11:31.691 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% And yet you're right, there is such a grieving that has 00:11:31.691 --> 00:11:33.059 align:start line:69% position:50% size:25% to happen. 00:11:33.059 --> 00:11:35.395 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% And allowing the Lord to walk with us through it is 00:11:35.395 --> 00:11:37.463 align:start line:69% position:47% size:53% foundational to this. 00:11:37.463 --> 00:11:41.067 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Blynda: But I love in the book when you say that forgiveness 00:11:41.067 --> 00:11:46.039 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% isn't just a command, but it's an invitation. 00:11:46.039 --> 00:11:48.741 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% What does that mean, that forgiveness is actually an 00:11:48.741 --> 00:11:51.477 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% invitation, not just a command? 00:11:51.477 --> 00:11:54.714 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Alexandra: I think for many of us, we think that forgiveness is 00:11:54.714 --> 00:11:57.283 align:start line:69% position:47% size:53% for the other person. 00:11:57.283 --> 00:12:00.386 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And I do think there is an element, right, where we get to 00:12:00.386 --> 00:12:03.222 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% look at somebody and say, "Because I have experienced so 00:12:03.222 --> 00:12:06.192 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% much compassion and grace in my life, I want you to experience 00:12:06.192 --> 00:12:07.527 align:start line:69% position:50% size:25% the same." 00:12:07.527 --> 00:12:08.895 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% But it takes a lot to get there. 00:12:08.895 --> 00:12:10.763 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Let's be honest, it takes a lot longer to get there, then to 00:12:10.763 --> 00:12:14.601 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% say, "The Lord is inviting me to release the person that has 00:12:14.601 --> 00:12:16.869 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% wounded me because they know how to heal me better than 00:12:16.869 --> 00:12:19.238 align:start line:69% position:50% size:25% they can." 00:12:19.238 --> 00:12:22.442 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% And it is an invitation, I believe, to be able to say to 00:12:22.442 --> 00:12:26.212 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% God, "I trust you more than I do my pain," an invitation to 00:12:26.212 --> 00:12:29.415 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% really actually heal outside of looking for the closure we 00:12:29.415 --> 00:12:32.452 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% thought we needed from the things that happened to us. 00:12:32.452 --> 00:12:35.088 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% And I do think that in the process of grieving, in the 00:12:35.088 --> 00:12:38.257 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% process of healing, I do think we get to the end of this road 00:12:38.257 --> 00:12:41.628 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% and say, "I want you to experience the grace I have." 00:12:41.628 --> 00:12:44.130 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% We don't always start there, which is why I think it's an 00:12:44.130 --> 00:12:46.566 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% invitation to start the process with the God of forgiveness. 00:12:46.566 --> 00:12:48.468 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Blynda: And don't you also think it's an invitation, like for me 00:12:48.468 --> 00:12:52.205 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% when I think about it, it gives me the opportunity to 00:12:52.205 --> 00:12:55.475 align:start line:63% position:47% size:63% self-reflect, and to know that I am in such need of 00:12:55.475 --> 00:12:56.843 align:start line:69% position:50% size:45% God's forgiveness. 00:12:56.843 --> 00:13:00.913 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% It's like the invitation for me to say, "God, of course I want 00:13:00.913 --> 00:13:03.850 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% to extend forgiveness where I can, because look what you've 00:13:03.850 --> 00:13:05.318 align:start line:69% position:50% size:31% done for me. 00:13:05.318 --> 00:13:08.354 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% I'm not deserving of all the forgiveness you've offered me," 00:13:08.354 --> 00:13:10.690 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% and I wanna be reminded of that. 00:13:10.690 --> 00:13:13.526 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Every time I have the option to forgive or not to forgive, I 00:13:13.526 --> 00:13:16.095 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% wanna be thinking of him and what he did for me. 00:13:16.095 --> 00:13:19.365 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Alexandra: I think that's so key because for many, I mean, this 00:13:19.365 --> 00:13:23.970 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% message is impossible without us rehearsing back to ourselves 00:13:23.970 --> 00:13:26.873 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% every day just how much we've been forgiven. 00:13:26.873 --> 00:13:29.242 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% And I think that sometimes we take that too lightly. 00:13:29.242 --> 00:13:33.146 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% Like, we don't think enough about the cross and we don't 00:13:33.146 --> 00:13:37.750 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% think enough about the grace, right, the agape love that the 00:13:37.750 --> 00:13:39.752 align:start line:69% position:47% size:63% Lord has covered us with. 00:13:39.752 --> 00:13:43.122 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% I do think, because of the exact thing that you just said, I do 00:13:43.122 --> 00:13:45.258 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% think that unless we are rehearsing back to ourselves, 00:13:45.258 --> 00:13:48.528 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son." 00:13:48.528 --> 00:13:50.997 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Because of that access we have, I get to forgive others, and 00:13:50.997 --> 00:13:53.399 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% until we get there, until we recognize how much we are loved 00:13:53.399 --> 00:13:56.469 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% by God, it will be very difficult to live unoffended 00:13:56.469 --> 00:13:59.005 align:start line:69% position:48% size:38% with the world. 00:13:59.005 --> 00:14:02.208 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Randy: So for anybody who's watching out there, and this is 00:14:02.208 --> 00:14:06.846 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% resonating probably in a little bit of a painful way, where do 00:14:06.846 --> 00:14:08.414 align:start line:69% position:50% size:21% they go? 00:14:08.414 --> 00:14:13.019 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% How do they start this process that you've walked through? 00:14:13.019 --> 00:14:15.254 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Alexandra: I would say to them, if we were sitting over a cup of 00:14:15.254 --> 00:14:19.525 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% coffee or a cup of tea, that today is the day where you 00:14:19.525 --> 00:14:21.828 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% surrender to God the things that you thought you could heal on 00:14:21.828 --> 00:14:23.396 align:start line:69% position:48% size:23% your own. 00:14:23.396 --> 00:14:27.867 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% And I do think that it has to be a choice to go from self 00:14:27.867 --> 00:14:30.269 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% awareness, because I don't think we're lacking self awareness. 00:14:30.269 --> 00:14:32.505 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% I think we're aware of our pain. 00:14:32.505 --> 00:14:36.509 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% I think what we--the choice is in releasing it to the Lord, is 00:14:36.509 --> 00:14:38.878 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% in saying, "God, I want you to help me. 00:14:38.878 --> 00:14:40.246 align:start line:69% position:50% size:65% I'm at the end of myself." 00:14:40.246 --> 00:14:42.715 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And I think a simple way to do that, a practical way, truly is 00:14:42.715 --> 00:14:46.486 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% to say to God, "Lord, I give you the pain that I can no 00:14:46.486 --> 00:14:47.920 align:start line:69% position:48% size:33% longer carry. 00:14:47.920 --> 00:14:49.388 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% Help me heal from this offense." 00:14:49.388 --> 00:14:51.758 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And I do believe that the power of prayer, and even just the 00:14:51.758 --> 00:14:55.828 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% release of our words to God, begins to shift something in us 00:14:55.828 --> 00:14:59.866 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% and invites us in to walk with him in a place where we've been 00:14:59.866 --> 00:15:01.768 align:start line:69% position:50% size:61% too closed off to do so. 00:15:01.768 --> 00:15:04.470 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% Randy: Obviously that's something that you do 00:15:04.470 --> 00:15:05.805 align:start line:69% position:50% size:31% by yourself. 00:15:05.805 --> 00:15:07.173 align:start line:69% position:50% size:61% Alexandra: All the time. 00:15:07.173 --> 00:15:08.908 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Randy: But did you ever go to someone else and say, "Would you 00:15:08.908 --> 00:15:10.243 align:start line:69% position:47% size:63% pray with me about this?" 00:15:10.243 --> 00:15:14.013 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Alexandra: Oh my gosh, there's an element of not just 00:15:14.013 --> 00:15:17.049 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% community, I would say covenant community when it comes to 00:15:17.049 --> 00:15:20.086 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% walking through offense and forgiveness, where sometimes 00:15:20.086 --> 00:15:21.587 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% we're not going to want to pray for ourselves. 00:15:21.587 --> 00:15:23.422 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Absolutely, I've got a handful of people in my life, my 00:15:23.422 --> 00:15:24.757 align:start line:69% position:48% size:43% husband included. 00:15:24.757 --> 00:15:26.659 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% I've gone to Mario, I mean, I talk about it in the book where 00:15:26.659 --> 00:15:30.129 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% I've gone to him and said, "Hey, I need you to pray for me. 00:15:30.129 --> 00:15:33.833 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% It feels impossible today to release this pain point or this 00:15:33.833 --> 00:15:36.169 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% person to God," and let's be honest, let's be real, right? 00:15:36.169 --> 00:15:41.707 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Like, it is difficult to reconcile what people have done 00:15:41.707 --> 00:15:43.943 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% to you sometimes, because sometimes it is unfathomable, I 00:15:43.943 --> 00:15:46.312 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% mean, the pain that they have caused, right? 00:15:46.312 --> 00:15:47.680 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% And you have to give it to God. 00:15:47.680 --> 00:15:50.216 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And so yeah, I think there's an element of saying, "I can't, 00:15:50.216 --> 00:15:51.751 align:start line:69% position:50% size:45% will you help me?" 00:15:51.751 --> 00:15:54.320 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Blynda: It makes me wanna just tell the audience, remind the 00:15:54.320 --> 00:15:57.757 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% audience, that right now, if you are listening to Alexandra and 00:15:57.757 --> 00:16:00.560 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% your heart is like beating out of your chest because you know 00:16:00.560 --> 00:16:04.197 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% you've carried an offense for too long, you know that you want 00:16:04.197 --> 00:16:08.501 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% to live free from the chains of offense, there are people right 00:16:08.501 --> 00:16:12.538 align:start line:69% position:45% size:73% now waiting to pray with you. 00:16:12.538 --> 00:16:17.710 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Do not neglect the supernatural thing that happens when we come 00:16:17.710 --> 00:16:19.045 align:start line:69% position:48% size:48% together in prayer. 00:16:19.045 --> 00:16:21.781 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% So right now there's the number on the bottom of your screen. 00:16:21.781 --> 00:16:23.316 align:start line:69% position:50% size:65% Call right now for prayer. 00:16:23.316 --> 00:16:25.885 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% They're waiting to pray with you, to partner with you, to 00:16:25.885 --> 00:16:28.187 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% connect with you, to show compassion towards 00:16:28.187 --> 00:16:29.522 align:start line:69% position:48% size:38% your situation. 00:16:29.522 --> 00:16:30.890 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% Don't neglect doing it. 00:16:30.890 --> 00:16:32.425 align:start line:63% position:50% size:45% Don't hold off for another moment. 00:16:32.425 --> 00:16:35.428 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% Right now, pick up the phone and call. 00:16:35.428 --> 00:16:38.297 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Randy: That really is an invitation, and you know, your 00:16:38.297 --> 00:16:41.734 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% first step a lot of times to healing. 00:16:41.734 --> 00:16:46.606 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% I wanna leave with some hope, because you talk about new 00:16:46.606 --> 00:16:51.477 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% beginnings and for people who have just years and years, the 00:16:51.477 --> 00:16:55.414 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% idea of a new beginning almost sounds too good to be true. 00:16:55.414 --> 00:16:57.116 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% What do you experience? 00:16:57.116 --> 00:16:58.918 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% Alexandra: Oh, gosh, there's a story. 00:16:58.918 --> 00:17:01.220 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% The Lord had given me--there was a moment we had gone to a 00:17:01.220 --> 00:17:03.256 align:start line:69% position:48% size:38% friend's house. 00:17:03.256 --> 00:17:05.892 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% One of our friend's daughters had gotten hit in the eye with a 00:17:05.892 --> 00:17:08.394 align:start line:63% position:50% size:50% toy car, and she had to get stitches. 00:17:08.394 --> 00:17:11.364 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% It was a whole thing, and I remember the Lord saying to me 00:17:11.364 --> 00:17:14.634 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% that day--she had come up to me, she said, "Hey Alex, my eye 00:17:14.634 --> 00:17:16.802 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% really hurts," and I was like, "Yeah, well, you just got hit in 00:17:16.802 --> 00:17:19.038 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% the eye with a car, it's gonna hurt," right? 00:17:19.038 --> 00:17:21.774 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And I looked at her stitches and she said, "Man, the stitches 00:17:21.774 --> 00:17:23.175 align:start line:69% position:48% size:33% still sting." 00:17:23.175 --> 00:17:25.344 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And I looked at her and I said, "Right, that means that your 00:17:25.344 --> 00:17:27.713 align:start line:69% position:50% size:41% body's healing." 00:17:27.713 --> 00:17:30.149 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And so maybe for those who are listening today or watching this 00:17:30.149 --> 00:17:32.685 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% and they're saying, "Alex, it still hurts," it's going 00:17:32.685 --> 00:17:34.053 align:start line:69% position:50% size:21% to hurt. 00:17:34.053 --> 00:17:36.555 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% But that does not mean that God's not healing. 00:17:36.555 --> 00:17:41.427 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And our new beginnings with God are always, always going to 00:17:41.427 --> 00:17:44.096 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% happen in the middle of what we think is the greatest mess of 00:17:44.096 --> 00:17:45.464 align:start line:69% position:50% size:25% our lives. 00:17:45.464 --> 00:17:48.968 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And so if you are walking and it is painful, remember that God's 00:17:48.968 --> 00:17:51.103 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% tending to you, even in the midst of your pain. 00:17:51.103 --> 00:17:54.273 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And the pain that we are feeling is a process with God of 00:17:54.273 --> 00:17:58.010 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% releasing, of grieving, and trusting him to do what we can. 00:17:58.010 --> 00:17:59.812 align:start line:69% position:50% size:56% And what hope that is. 00:17:59.812 --> 00:18:02.348 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Randy: You know what you probably haven't noticed in our 00:18:02.348 --> 00:18:03.716 align:start line:69% position:50% size:45% conversation here? 00:18:03.716 --> 00:18:05.051 align:start line:69% position:47% size:63% And most people wouldn't. 00:18:05.051 --> 00:18:07.019 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% I've got a scar right here, because I had stitches from an 00:18:07.019 --> 00:18:09.522 align:start line:69% position:50% size:41% accident, right? 00:18:09.522 --> 00:18:11.524 align:start line:69% position:50% size:70% Are you okay with the scars? 00:18:11.524 --> 00:18:14.193 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% Alexandra: What a testimony to have them. 00:18:14.193 --> 00:18:17.496 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Like that, that in and of itself is a whole other episode that we 00:18:17.496 --> 00:18:19.799 align:start line:69% position:50% size:81% can go back to and talk through. 00:18:19.799 --> 00:18:24.804 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% I don't think that we would have the testimonies if we didn't 00:18:24.804 --> 00:18:26.172 align:start line:69% position:48% size:43% have these tests. 00:18:26.172 --> 00:18:29.141 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And those scars in our lives are the proof that God has healed 00:18:29.141 --> 00:18:32.545 align:start line:63% position:47% size:63% us, and that God has done exactly what he said he 00:18:32.545 --> 00:18:33.913 align:start line:69% position:48% size:23% would do. 00:18:33.913 --> 00:18:36.882 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And so not only am I okay with the scars, but I do see them as 00:18:36.882 --> 00:18:42.154 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% a part of the process and that has also been such a framework 00:18:42.154 --> 00:18:46.425 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% shift for me of like, oh right, this is how God moves. 00:18:46.425 --> 00:18:49.662 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Not only does he come in and save us, but he then takes the 00:18:49.662 --> 00:18:52.865 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% things that we felt too far gone, redeems them, and then 00:18:52.865 --> 00:18:55.101 align:start line:63% position:50% size:41% makes us wounded healers from it. 00:18:55.101 --> 00:18:56.435 align:start line:69% position:50% size:16% Crazy. 00:18:56.435 --> 00:18:58.170 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Randy: Yeah, every time I look in the mirror I can go, "Oh, 00:18:58.170 --> 00:18:59.939 align:start line:63% position:48% size:43% well, God brought me through that." 00:18:59.939 --> 00:19:01.307 align:start line:69% position:44% size:78% You know, he was there with me. 00:19:01.307 --> 00:19:03.676 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% Because it was painful. 00:19:03.676 --> 00:19:05.344 align:start line:63% position:47% size:53% Oh yeah, most painful thing in my life. 00:19:05.344 --> 00:19:09.215 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And I've got that scar, but you know what, God's a good God. 00:19:09.215 --> 00:19:11.884 align:start line:63% position:50% size:45% He's with us, he brings us through. 00:19:11.884 --> 00:19:14.887 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% There are a lot of people right now who have a situation where 00:19:14.887 --> 00:19:16.389 align:start line:69% position:47% size:58% they need some healing. 00:19:16.389 --> 00:19:20.926 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% The scars are very real, the situations are very tough. 00:19:20.926 --> 00:19:24.196 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% And just as we've talked to you today, through Alexandra's 00:19:24.196 --> 00:19:28.401 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% testimony about God wanting to be there to bring us out of our 00:19:28.401 --> 00:19:32.304 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% pain, to heal us, we have an opportunity to bring some other 00:19:32.304 --> 00:19:36.108 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% people out of pain, literal pain. 00:19:36.108 --> 00:19:38.110 align:start line:69% position:50% size:75% Watch this and you'll see how. 00:19:39.278 --> 00:19:48.354 align:start line:69% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:19:48.354 --> 00:19:50.890 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% John Yeatts: All week long we've been here talking to mothers 00:19:50.890 --> 00:19:54.493 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% that have sick children, or mothers who've lost children to 00:19:54.493 --> 00:19:55.995 align:start line:69% position:48% size:48% waterborne illness. 00:19:55.995 --> 00:19:59.598 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% But the fact is you can see right over my shoulder, this is 00:19:59.598 --> 00:20:00.933 align:start line:69% position:48% size:43% the water source. 00:20:00.933 --> 00:20:04.136 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% This is the only water source for this entire village. 00:20:04.136 --> 00:20:06.739 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% That water, what you wouldn't see is the death 00:20:06.739 --> 00:20:08.741 align:start line:69% position:48% size:43% that it contains. 00:20:09.742 --> 00:20:11.744 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% [speaking foreign language] 00:20:56.422 --> 00:21:00.126 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% John Yeatts: These water sources are repeated in all the places 00:21:00.126 --> 00:21:01.694 align:start line:69% position:48% size:33% that we work. 00:21:01.694 --> 00:21:04.897 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% And if you were on vacation you might say how beautiful it is, 00:21:04.897 --> 00:21:08.267 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% but if you had to live here and get your water from this river, 00:21:08.267 --> 00:21:13.105 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% you would understand that it is actually a cup of death. 00:21:13.105 --> 00:21:17.076 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Would you help us prevent moms from having to come here anymore 00:21:17.076 --> 00:21:20.246 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% to gather the water for their families to use? 00:21:20.246 --> 00:21:24.350 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% So I'm asking you, please join us so that we can bring the 00:21:24.350 --> 00:21:27.186 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% Water for Life to villages just like this. 00:21:34.326 --> 00:21:38.330 align:start line:63% position:44% size:78% Randy: You know it is a very tough situation, a very complex 00:21:38.330 --> 00:21:42.067 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% situation, but the solution is so simple. 00:21:42.067 --> 00:21:45.437 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% And you know, Blynda, when I look at that I go, wow, the need 00:21:45.437 --> 00:21:48.774 align:start line:63% position:48% size:48% is great, but the resources are here. 00:21:48.774 --> 00:21:50.109 align:start line:63% position:50% size:56% It's within our power. 00:21:50.109 --> 00:21:51.477 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% Blynda: It's within our power. 00:21:51.477 --> 00:21:53.546 align:start line:58% position:50% size:65% And it really doesn't take that much per person. 00:21:53.546 --> 00:21:56.882 align:start line:58% position:46% size:68% If everybody does a little, all of those gifts add up. 00:21:56.882 --> 00:22:01.253 align:start line:58% position:50% size:70% And I watch that and I think about the mom who isn't just 00:22:01.253 --> 00:22:02.755 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% walking to get clean water. 00:22:02.755 --> 00:22:05.324 align:start line:58% position:50% size:70% That would be--that's hard enough in those villages, if 00:22:05.324 --> 00:22:07.026 align:start line:63% position:50% size:75% you're walking to clean water. 00:22:07.026 --> 00:22:11.030 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% But she's walking to go get dirty water for her children, 00:22:11.030 --> 00:22:14.099 align:start line:58% position:50% size:65% and I think as a mom, I think I would do anything. 00:22:14.099 --> 00:22:17.269 align:start line:58% position:50% size:65% I would be desperate to do anything for my children 00:22:17.269 --> 00:22:18.604 align:start line:63% position:50% size:21% to live. 00:22:18.604 --> 00:22:21.774 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% But to know that I'm going two miles, three miles to get dirty 00:22:21.774 --> 00:22:24.910 align:start line:58% position:46% size:68% water to then maybe make them sick, is so painful to 00:22:24.910 --> 00:22:26.245 align:start line:63% position:50% size:31% think about. 00:22:26.245 --> 00:22:28.781 align:start line:58% position:50% size:75% And to think that we, at our fingertips, have the resources 00:22:28.781 --> 00:22:30.382 align:start line:63% position:50% size:61% to change that for them. 00:22:30.382 --> 00:22:33.485 align:start line:58% position:50% size:75% Randy: And that's so true, and you know, when you go to these 00:22:33.485 --> 00:22:39.225 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% places where I've been, you see the dedication of a lot of these 00:22:39.225 --> 00:22:43.429 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% mothers, and some fathers, to go to provide for their children. 00:22:43.429 --> 00:22:47.333 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% They'll do whatever they can, and the rivers are contaminated, 00:22:47.333 --> 00:22:48.701 align:start line:63% position:48% size:23% you know? 00:22:48.701 --> 00:22:52.104 align:start line:58% position:50% size:75% Sometimes there's plenty of water, but none of it's clean. 00:22:52.104 --> 00:22:54.406 align:start line:58% position:50% size:56% They'll try to strain it, sometimes boil it. 00:22:54.406 --> 00:22:57.109 align:start line:58% position:47% size:58% Most of them don't have much to boil with. 00:22:57.109 --> 00:22:59.378 align:start line:58% position:50% size:45% And in some cases it's a dry season. 00:22:59.378 --> 00:23:01.547 align:start line:63% position:45% size:73% There's just no water around. 00:23:01.547 --> 00:23:04.917 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% I've seen people try to get water out of the side of a hill 00:23:04.917 --> 00:23:08.554 align:start line:58% position:50% size:75% where it would sort of seep into a low place, or there's a 00:23:08.554 --> 00:23:13.492 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% hand-dug well where contaminants can blow in, and it's really not 00:23:13.492 --> 00:23:17.663 align:start line:58% position:48% size:48% deep enough to draw the pure water. 00:23:17.663 --> 00:23:19.665 align:start line:63% position:47% size:58% But we can change that. 00:23:19.665 --> 00:23:24.670 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% Together you and I can go in, and this year our goal is 350 00:23:24.670 --> 00:23:31.410 align:start line:58% position:50% size:75% wells in 20 different nations, because the need is great. 00:23:31.410 --> 00:23:36.615 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% The average well will serve 1,000 people for about 70 years, 00:23:36.615 --> 00:23:41.020 align:start line:58% position:50% size:56% and that's because we drill the wells right. 00:23:41.020 --> 00:23:44.323 align:start line:58% position:50% size:65% We go in deep enough, like I said, to get that pure 00:23:44.323 --> 00:23:45.691 align:start line:63% position:48% size:38% drinking water. 00:23:45.691 --> 00:23:47.860 align:start line:58% position:50% size:50% We encase it, we put a hand pump on it. 00:23:47.860 --> 00:23:53.432 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% This is water for life, but it's only possible when people just 00:23:53.432 --> 00:23:56.702 align:start line:58% position:47% size:53% like you say, "I want to do something." 00:23:56.702 --> 00:24:01.740 align:start line:58% position:50% size:75% And the something is the important part, because a gift 00:24:01.740 --> 00:24:06.445 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% of $48 right now will, on average, provide ten people with 00:24:06.445 --> 00:24:07.813 align:start line:63% position:48% size:38% water for life. 00:24:07.813 --> 00:24:13.052 align:start line:58% position:46% size:68% A gift of $144 would provide that for 30 people. 00:24:13.052 --> 00:24:15.888 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% When we look at all of the wells that we drill in a year and all 00:24:15.888 --> 00:24:19.758 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% the difficult places we go into and all the hard work we put in 00:24:19.758 --> 00:24:24.697 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% to making these things last, the average cost is about $4800, and 00:24:24.697 --> 00:24:28.167 align:start line:63% position:50% size:65% some of you could do that. 00:24:28.167 --> 00:24:31.503 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% I just believe it's important that we do something, and 00:24:31.503 --> 00:24:34.773 align:start line:58% position:50% size:65% Blynda, I know the results are great when we do. 00:24:34.773 --> 00:24:38.177 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% Blynda: And it is amazing how our money can just multiply when 00:24:38.177 --> 00:24:40.679 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% we just do the best gift we can. 00:24:40.679 --> 00:24:44.516 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% And I just wanna encourage you, go make the best gift you can, 00:24:44.516 --> 00:24:48.354 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% and just remember that every time you do make that gift, you 00:24:48.354 --> 00:24:50.155 align:start line:63% position:50% size:35% change a life. 00:24:50.155 --> 00:24:53.625 align:start line:10% position:44% size:78% announcer: Every day, thousands of lives are lost to waterborne 00:24:53.625 --> 00:24:56.528 align:start line:10% position:50% size:81% disease, and nearly half of those are children under the age 00:24:56.528 --> 00:24:57.896 align:start line:10% position:50% size:21% of five. 00:24:57.896 --> 00:25:01.233 align:start line:10% position:44% size:78% Through mission Water for Life, you can give mothers hope and 00:25:01.233 --> 00:25:05.504 align:start line:10% position:50% size:81% children a future, as we provide clean, fresh drinking water, 00:25:05.504 --> 00:25:07.806 align:start line:10% position:50% size:70% free from the fear of death. 00:25:07.806 --> 00:25:11.910 align:start line:10% position:45% size:73% With your gift today, you can help drill and establish 350 00:25:11.910 --> 00:25:13.645 align:start line:10% position:50% size:56% water wells this year. 00:25:13.645 --> 00:25:17.116 align:start line:10% position:50% size:65% Your gift of $24 will help provide clean water for 00:25:17.116 --> 00:25:18.450 align:start line:10% position:50% size:35% five children. 00:25:18.450 --> 00:25:21.053 align:start line:10% position:47% size:53% A gift of $48 will help provide for ten. 00:25:21.053 --> 00:25:25.791 align:start line:10% position:44% size:78% And $144 will help provide life-giving water for 30 people 00:25:25.791 --> 00:25:27.126 align:start line:10% position:48% size:38% for a lifetime. 00:25:27.126 --> 00:25:31.130 align:start line:10% position:50% size:81% With a gift of any amount, we'll send you "Discovering the Joy of 00:25:31.130 --> 00:25:32.498 align:start line:10% position:50% size:50% Reading God's Word." 00:25:32.498 --> 00:25:36.168 align:start line:10% position:50% size:81% Whether you've read the Bible for years or are just beginning, 00:25:36.168 --> 00:25:39.671 align:start line:10% position:50% size:81% this book invites you to experience Scripture in a fresh, 00:25:39.671 --> 00:25:41.039 align:start line:10% position:50% size:45% more intimate way. 00:25:41.039 --> 00:25:45.344 align:start line:10% position:44% size:78% With your gift of $100 or more, you may request "A Life of 00:25:45.344 --> 00:25:48.781 align:start line:10% position:44% size:78% Compassion" coffee table book, capturing LIFE Outreach's heart 00:25:48.781 --> 00:25:50.115 align:start line:10% position:50% size:35% for the world. 00:25:50.115 --> 00:25:54.019 align:start line:10% position:44% size:78% Each page pairs timeless Bible verses with vivid mission field 00:25:54.019 --> 00:25:58.624 align:start line:10% position:47% size:63% photography, making God's Word visible in action. 00:25:58.624 --> 00:26:02.995 align:start line:10% position:44% size:78% Finally, please consider a gift of $1200 to help provide water 00:26:02.995 --> 00:26:08.400 align:start line:10% position:50% size:65% for 250 people, or a gift of $4800 to help sponsor a 00:26:08.400 --> 00:26:09.735 align:start line:10% position:50% size:35% complete well. 00:26:09.735 --> 00:26:13.839 align:start line:10% position:50% size:70% And request Life's beautiful 2026 bronze sculpture, The 00:26:13.839 --> 00:26:15.240 align:start line:10% position:50% size:35% Good Shepherd. 00:26:15.240 --> 00:26:18.577 align:start line:10% position:46% size:68% Please call, write, or make your gift online today. 00:26:20.679 --> 00:26:22.614 align:start line:63% position:50% size:81% Randy: I do hope you're calling. 00:26:22.614 --> 00:26:23.949 align:start line:63% position:46% size:68% Make the best gift you can. 00:26:23.949 --> 00:26:26.585 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% You can request "You Can Let Go" and we would love to send it 00:26:26.585 --> 00:26:30.122 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% with you as you support Water for Life, because Alexandra, 00:26:30.122 --> 00:26:33.192 align:start line:58% position:46% size:68% it's been such an important and I think hopeful program 00:26:33.192 --> 00:26:35.160 align:start line:63% position:48% size:28% for people. 00:26:35.160 --> 00:26:37.095 align:start line:58% position:50% size:45% What would you say to them to end? 00:26:37.095 --> 00:26:40.732 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% Alexandra: Yeah, friend, if you are watching this today and you 00:26:40.732 --> 00:26:43.802 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% are like, "Man, that resonates with me," I want you to hear me 00:26:43.802 --> 00:26:45.270 align:start line:63% position:48% size:28% so clearly. 00:26:45.270 --> 00:26:48.874 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% There is more ahead for you out of your pain and offense. 00:26:48.874 --> 00:26:51.777 align:start line:58% position:50% size:81% And freedom is possible from the things that you felt like were 00:26:51.777 --> 00:26:53.579 align:start line:58% position:47% size:53% too far gone or maybe you were stuck in. 00:26:53.579 --> 00:26:57.983 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% And so today, just know that God is healing and restoring. 00:26:57.983 --> 00:27:00.419 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% He's piecing you back together, and the things that you felt 00:27:00.419 --> 00:27:03.322 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% like, "Man, God, I'm not sure what to do with this," he's 00:27:03.322 --> 00:27:05.023 align:start line:58% position:50% size:61% already working out for your good and his glory. 00:27:05.023 --> 00:27:07.860 align:start line:58% position:50% size:50% And this is just the beginning for you. 00:27:07.860 --> 00:27:09.294 align:start line:63% position:50% size:45% Blynda: Beautiful. 00:27:09.294 --> 00:27:10.762 align:start line:58% position:47% size:53% Thank you so much for being with us today. 00:27:10.762 --> 00:27:12.564 align:start line:58% position:46% size:68% Alexandra: I love you guys. What a gift. 00:27:12.564 --> 00:27:14.066 align:start line:58% position:50% size:50% Randy: And thank you guys for watching. 00:27:14.066 --> 00:27:16.468 align:start line:58% position:50% size:61% We'll see you again next time on "Life Today." 00:27:16.468 --> 00:27:26.478 align:start line:63% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:27:26.478 --> 00:27:36.488 align:start line:63% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:27:36.488 --> 00:27:46.498 align:start line:63% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:27:46.498 --> 00:27:56.508 align:start line:63% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:27:56.508 --> 00:28:02.214 align:start line:63% position:48% size:18% [music] 00:28:02.214 --> 00:28:05.918 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% Janelle Bruland: And I was just sobbing uncontrollably and it 00:28:05.918 --> 00:28:07.286 align:start line:63% position:50% size:35% wouldn't stop. 00:28:07.286 --> 00:28:11.390 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% announcer: Janelle Bruland suffered with undiagnosed PTSD. 00:28:12.558 --> 00:28:14.893 align:start line:58% position:44% size:78% announcer: "Life Today" is made possible by the supporters of 00:28:14.893 --> 00:28:16.228 align:start line:63% position:50% size:70% LIFE Outreach International. 00:28:16.228 --> 00:28:18.297 align:start line:58% position:50% size:65% Your gift will be used exclusively for the exempt 00:28:18.297 --> 00:28:19.631 align:start line:63% position:48% size:43% purposes of LIFE. 00:28:19.631 --> 00:28:22.100 align:start line:58% position:50% size:75% The ministry features specific outreaches as examples of the 00:28:22.100 --> 00:28:23.602 align:start line:58% position:50% size:50% programs it supports and conducts. 00:28:23.602 --> 00:28:25.737 align:start line:58% position:45% size:73% Gifts are considered to be without restriction as to use 00:28:25.737 --> 00:28:27.472 align:start line:58% position:50% size:61% unless explicitly stipulated by the donor. 00:28:27.472 --> 00:28:29.474 align:start line:58% position:48% size:48% The ministry is a member of the ECFA.